May 14th will mark 8 months since Ella’s passing. So much has happened in these last eight months. To recap, I started a new job, we bought a new house, and learned that Ella will be a big sister. All of these happenings have a little bit of Ella in each and every one of them. My new job is not directly related to Ella, but I am sure that she is watching over me. The new baby boy (due July 10th) is only possible through God, but Ella did tell Sarah that she wanted a baby sister for her birthday last year. This helped mine and Sarah’s healing process and opened us up to the possibility of trying for another child. Ella didn’t get her wish of a sister, but we may not be done trying. Either way, Ella will be a big sister and most certainly will be the best one ever! Ella also led us to the house that we most recently purchased. Sarah and I have forever been apartment dwellers and settling down in KC is a huge deal to us! We have committed to this town and community. We have felt so much love and couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. Our house had and has Ella written all over it. On Friday, we officially moved into our new house, but moving out of our apartment was bittersweet. Our apartment is the last place that our sweet Ella lived and played, and it was hard to leave. While moving out, Sarah and I noticed a hand print of Ella’s on the wall. If only the apartment complex wouldn’t charge us for missing drywall, I would have cut it out and taken it with us. We moved into our house and we absolutely love it, but it feels (it know that it is just a feeling) like we left a little piece of Ella behind. Ella would have (and I’m sure that she is) loved our new house. It has a huge backyard with a play structure and she would have been pumped! There’s so much room to run and play. Ella’s cousin, Jacob, came over this weekend and tested out the backyard. His smile was priceless. I bet Ella was right beside him the whole time!
Time has gotten harder for Sarah and I. We are still waiting for the day that this loss gets easier. During this moving week, so many of Ella’s favorite songs were heard on the radio and it makes us smile! These songs aren’t necessarily popular anymore, so its as if Ella was telling us that, “It’s okay.” Even so, it is still hard. We are excited for Ella’s brother to arrive, but we are also nervous. We are nervous that his arrival will make us miss Ella even more. We are excited to love a new child and we have so much love to give. This sentiment may seem strange, but it doesn’t make it less true. Sarah says that she doesn’t know if she’s ready for a boy, but I’m sure she’ll figure it out. Sarah is the best mom and Ella is proof of that. I hope that all of you mothers have a fantastic Mother’s Day this weekend!
Pediatric is real and needs our attention. Last weekend, Noah’s Bandage Project had their first annual 5K and 2,200 runner/walkers attended! NBP was able to write a check for $100,000 to Children’s Mercy Hospital (where Ella and her friends were/are treated) and will benefit pediatric cancer research. Please keep praying for Ella’s friends Joe, Malina, Jonah, Kit, Brooklynn, Wyatt, Brysin, and those not mentioned and definitely not forgotten. Thank you and God Bless! Saint Ella, pray for us!
Positively Ella 